Why it matters, how it shows up, and what to do in the moment

Resistance is one of those clinical concepts that many therapists recognize intuitively but struggle to define, assess, and respond to in real time. Historically, resistance has often been framed as something the client “brings” into the room, a sign they are not ready, not motivated, or not invested in change. More contemporary perspectives challenge this view, asking a harder and more useful question: what is happening in the interaction right now, and how might the therapist’s response shape what happens next?

In a recent Clearly Clinical conversation, Jordan Harris, LMFT, LPC, and supervisor, offers a practical and research grounded way of understanding resistance through the lens of process coding. His approach reframes resistance not as a client flaw, but as a predictable and meaningful moment in human interaction that gives therapists critical information about timing, direction, and responsiveness.

Resistance is not a diagnosis. It is a signal.

From a research standpoint, resistance is defined very simply: any opposition to the therapist or the therapy. That opposition may be subtle or overt, emotional or cognitive, polite or defensive. Importantly, resistance does not mean the client does not want to change. It often means the client does not agree with the direction, framing, or pace of the change being offered.

Clients may resist because of past negative experiences with professionals, cultural or contextual factors, fear of being judged, or disagreement with the proposed method of treatment. A client might want relief but not want it this way, at this moment, or with this level of pressure. When therapists miss or override these moments, resistance tends to grow rather than resolve.

Why resistance matters more than we think

Research on therapist responsiveness shows that how clinicians respond to resistance has an outsized impact on therapy outcomes, including dropout and long term engagement. Even brief missteps can have effects that linger months later. This does not mean therapists must get everything right. It means that resistance moments are high leverage moments. They are not neutral.

Seen this way, resistance is less like a roadblock and more like therapy mold. It appears naturally over time in any relational space. No one has done anything wrong, but if it is ignored or mishandled, it spreads.

Process coding helps therapists see resistance as it happens

Process coding refers to tracking moment to moment interaction between client and therapist, rather than focusing only on technique or model fidelity. It asks therapists to notice subtle shifts in tone, posture, pacing, language, and emotional energy that indicate whether the client is moving toward or away from the work.

A helpful metaphor is a traffic light. When therapist and client are aligned, the light is green. When hesitation or ambivalence appears, it turns yellow. When opposition shows up, it moves toward orange or red. The goal is not to eliminate red lights. The goal is to notice them quickly and respond skillfully.

This kind of awareness allows therapists to adjust in real time rather than waiting until the next session or a formal feedback measure to realize something went off track.

Not all client statements are the same

Drawing from motivational interviewing research, client statements generally fall into three categories:

Change talk, which signals readiness and movement toward action
Sustain talk, which emphasizes reasons change is difficult or unlikely
Resistance, which pushes back against the therapist or the therapeutic direction itself

When clients are offering change talk, intervention is usually appropriate. When clients are ambivalent, reflection and clarification help. When clients are resisting, the task is not to persuade or educate, but to defuse.

What increases resistance

Certain therapist responses reliably escalate resistance, especially when used at the wrong time. These include:

Being directive or corrective
Reframing in a way that contradicts the client’s stated experience
Cheerleading or pushing optimism
Emphasizing consequences before the client is ready
Asking questions that subtly argue with the client

These responses are not inherently wrong. They are simply poorly timed when resistance is present. When used in red light moments, they often communicate “I know better than you,” even if that is not the therapist’s intent.

What reduces resistance

Responses that reduce resistance tend to be supportive rather than directive. The most effective include:

Simple reflections
Validation
Normalization
Affirmation
Collaborative statements

Notably, “tell me more” questions often feel neutral but do not reliably reduce resistance. In many cases, a well placed reflection does more work than a complex intervention.

A simple reflection such as, “This has been part of your kids’ lives for a long time, and you are not sure what impact it has had,” can significantly soften opposition. When combined with validation or affirmation, resistance often decreases further.

The goal is not compliance. It is collaboration.

At its core, effective work with resistance honors client autonomy. It communicates, “I see you, I hear you, and I am with you.” This stance does not mean agreeing with all client choices. It means recognizing that change happens through collaboration, not power.

When therapists prioritize being right over being responsive, therapy stalls. When therapists respond to resistance with curiosity and respect, therapy moves.

A skill that becomes a way of being

With practice, process coding becomes less analytical and more intuitive. Therapists begin to feel shifts somatically rather than cognitively. The work becomes less about counting techniques and more about staying attuned.

This is one reason many clinicians experience these skills as pan theoretical. Whether grounded in CBT, EMDR, psychodynamic therapy, or somatic approaches, responsiveness to resistance improves outcomes across models.

Final thoughts

Resistance is not something to eliminate. It is something to understand. When therapists learn to identify it early and respond skillfully, sessions feel less stuck, clients feel more understood, and therapy becomes more humane.

As Dr. Jordan Harris emphasizes, once you learn to see these moments, you cannot unsee them. The work becomes not about following a script, but about staying in the dance.

If you want to deepen your clinical effectiveness, learning to recognize and respond to resistance may be one of the highest impact skills you can develop.